Kindergarten nurturer for 2 years.
Pregnant language arts teacher for a few months. Earthly mother to Himaya for 3 months.
Chief mourner for quite some time.
Substitute teacher for Pili class in-between.
Until finally this year the main teacher of the pioneering class of Tuburan. That’s pretty summing up the recent 5 years of my life gradually.
Not quite like the usual teacher you see on her way to work every day, I have no make-up, no uniform (yay!), no heels (more yay!). Instead, I carry a big backpack, I wear colors of the day, and boots for walking 400 meters back and forth the dirt road.
There’s nothing glamorous about being a pioneering teacher, really. But the years of hard work and sacrifices I have made as a teacher in Tuburan are also the most fruitful and meaningful years of my life. I’ve realized that one cannot just simply be good or beautiful or true to do the kind of inner work required of an individual who wishes to be part of a Waldorf school.
Sense of good is no longer about determining which is good and which is bad. Good is the balance that strikes across the evil of one-sidedness, of dogma. Sense of beauty is not about standards. It should never have been. Beauty is a gift of that which is ugly – the imago that a caterpillar undergoes first before it becomes a butterfly. Sense of truth is not just about what’s genuine. In front of my eyes, truth has transformed itself into sense of justice and sense of freedom where justice is not only constricted in laws but in self-management and where freedom entails a sense of responsibility.
It has asked so much of me – this life’s work – I’d like to call it.
It will take years and multiple books, I guess, to write about all of it. It has become so much more than just a day job. And it took me 4 years before I finally mustered the courage to write about this journey. To be here, to stand here, to be a servant of holy things, to be the kind heart coupled with the courage of lion, to be a brave spirit with the strong will of bull, to have fierce mind married with the keen sight of eagle. Welcome to my life and My Journey into the Nine Worlds with Pili Class.